Whenever I’m nervous to share my story, my mom always tells me, “Just one person. Just reach one person. You don’t have to touch everyone’s hearts, but your story might just be what one person needs at the perfect time.”
My family has been part of a charismatic community since I was a year old. Growing up, it was normal to hear someone’s testimony of how God worked in their lives. I heard stories of prodigal sons and daughters, broken marriages being healed, and of people finding a new purpose in their lives once they had a relationship with Jesus.
The only problem was I never heard any testimony that talked about struggling with, and thriving in spite of, a mental health condition.
At the age of 28, I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression. I was disappointed and angry. Most mental health stories I heard were difficult ones that didn’t echo a message of hope. On top of the emotions and thoughts that come with mental health struggles, I had to work through the stigma I placed upon myself and what this cross meant for me. I came to a major crisis in my faith and was angry at God for allowing this particular suffering into my life.
In the midst of it all, God’s steadfast love and mercy kept coming through. He showed his constant presence through my family, friends, and community, as well as the therapists and doctors I’ve worked with. He comforted me through the talents he himself gave me (creating art, singing, and cooking are very helpful!). The hope that only comes from Jesus came through the people I’ve met who have dealt with similar storms and brought light into the darkness that I felt.
There are people close to my heart who live with either anxiety, depression, PTSD, or bipolar disorder. Many have shared their struggles with me and encouraged me in my own journey. Most of them are what I would call “hidden warriors,” and a handful have been blessed to share their story with a wider audience.
Lisa Rumpel, The B.C. Catholic’s Resilient Catholic columnist, is one of them. After I heard her testimony, I thanked her for sharing it and confided in her about my struggles. She told me how long it had taken her to feel like it was time to share her account, and how she had learned that “our stories are not our own.” Of course, only a few people are privileged to know all the details of our lives, and not everyone needs to hear them – but like the life of Jesus, the lives of the saints, and the lives of our role models, our stories can become a beacon of hope for another person.
In the summer of 2020, God put it upon my heart to start something to pay it forward to the next person. With the ongoing pandemic, I can only imagine what it must be like for people to experience panic attacks, or bouts of hopelessness for the first time, while being on lockdown and losing the comfort of pre-pandemic daily life. I had no idea what this thing on my heart would turn into, so I entrusted it to our Lord.
With a lot of prayers, perseverance, and a handful of cheerleaders by my side, Project Luce was born and launched in late April 2021. The name Project Luce was inspired by a line from the Prayer of St. Francis of Assisi: “Where there is darkness, let me bring light.” Luce, in Italian, means light.
And so Project Luce became a series of 10 paintings I sold within Canada, with 100 per cent of the proceeds going to Sanctuary Mental Health Ministries.
I chose Sanctuary Mental Health Ministries as the recipient because of their mission to equip the Church to support mental health and wellbeing. The Sanctuary course includes videos of testimonies of brothers and sisters in Christ, and going through Sanctuary in a discussion/mental health support group with other Christians has helped me in my own journey.
It’s been five years since I was diagnosed, and while there are still hard days and difficult seasons, I know how far I’ve come. I’m not the first person to live with anxiety and depression, and I won’t be the last. This is why Project Luce exists – to bring hope to those who feel hopeless.
While all the paintings sold within 48 hours and I raised more than my donation goal, I know that the real fruits of this initiative are bigger than the funds raised. I pray that whoever has been touched by it will pay it forward, too.
Inca Siojo is Digital Designer for the Archdiocese of Vancouver’s Communications Office and Production Coordinator for The B.C. Catholic. You can follow her on Instagram.