Fools rush in where angels fear to tread. Here goeth I in the role of the fool.
A priest commenting on wedding dresses risks the wrath of brides, mothers of brides, bridesmaids and flower girls - and the woman scorned hath no fury compared to a bridal party which has taken offence. So asking only that the incoming artillery land gently upon the editor's desk, let me say this: brides would do well to follow the example of the new Duchess of Cambridge on her wedding day.
Kate Middleton's dress was a most pleasant surprise. My sister, over the years party to several weddings, referred to it as "elegantly modest."
That it would be beautiful was not in question, and Kate, as expected, demurred from the early 1980s excess of the dress worn by the late Diana, Princess of Wales, which was burdened with a train longer than most actual locomotives.
Princess Kate, as the popular appellation would have it, has done Christian weddings the world over a favour by demonstrating that elegance and modesty are not mutually opposed.
In recent years the norm for bridal dresses has been strapless numbers, and while they may be elegant, they are not suitably modest for church. Brides who want more appropriate dresses frequently complain that they are difficult to find, and so many resort to shawls and wraps for the wedding itself, setting them aside for the reception afterwards.
If Kate's choice indeed spawns the flood of imitations that fashion experts predict, then it will be a welcome correction to the trend of bridal gowns more suitable for the dance floor than the sanctuary.
Many a bride - and the bridesmaids who depend upon her - would prefer a wider range of options, including dresses that are both elegant and modest. Priests too, who see more brides than most, would also be grateful.
The royal bridal gown used lace, but no doubt creative designers will employ a range of options, each suited to the individual bride. Brides do not need revealing dresses to attract attention on their wedding day; all eyes are on them anyway. And because all eyes are on them, all the more should they give witness that Christian women can be fashionable, elegant, and modest.
Competing with the bridal gown itself for people's attention was the decision by the duchess to do her own make-up. It is instructive that a decision to do one's own make-up provoked a greater reaction than if she had decided to write her own wedding vows. Some things are truly important.
Many brides who day after day look pretty, wholesome, and natural in their own understated make-up arrive at their weddings looking rather less natural, even a bit garish. For this they get up at the crack of dawn and pay someone a considerable sum, when for less time and money they would look more beautiful at their own hands.
No doubt the global nuptial-industrial complex was horrified that the duchess demonstrated that contracting out what women do daily for themselves is not necessary, but all the better if the merchants of matrimony are chagrined. If a royal bride with money as no object does not need commercial makeup services, then all the more should ordinary brides feel liberated!
A final note. Preaching at weddings, for which I usually prepare with greater attention than I would for a regular Sunday, has always raised a question in my mind: is anyone listening? Minds are understandably elsewhere.
I do hope the great and the good assembled in Westminster Abbey, from the Prince of Wales to the custodians setting up the chairs, listened to the excellent homily of Dr. Richard Chartres, Anglican Bishop of London.
"Be who God meant you to be and you will set the world on fire," he began. "So said St. Catherine of Siena, whose festival day it is today. Marriage is intended to be a way in which man and woman help each other to become what God meant each one to be: their deepest and truest selves."
It was a nice Catholic touch to mention the saint of the day, and broad-minded of Bishop Chartres to quote Catherine of Siena, known principally for persuading the Pope of her day to return to Rome, where the pastor of the universal Church belongs.
Her words shed light upon the fundamental Christian understanding of marriage, in which the husband's mission is to help his wife become a saint, and in turn, the wife's mission is to so help her husband: to become who God means us to be - disciples on the road to heaven.
That's how I begin every marriage preparation session. Perhaps I should now show couples the royal wedding video for spiritual, as well as fashion, advice.
Father Raymond J. de Souza is the pastor of Sacred Heart of Mary Parish on Wolfe Island, and chaplain of Newman House at Queen's University in Kingston, Ont.