When we moved a year ago, we left behind a little, old ragamuffin of a house in Mission, B.C. The memories and events that took place over the 11 years we lived there make up a huge portion of our life together and are irreplaceable. At the same time, even though it has not even been a year and a half since we moved, the house feels like a distant memory. At least to me, it does.
I know that for children it is a different matter. Their short lives were spent in that one home, and the vast majority of their memories were made there. Thomas has frequently sighed and told me, “I miss our old house,” and, “I wish we were in our old house.” It shocks me each time, because I can’t imagine what it is that he misses that isn’t outdone by our new home.
When I ask, the answer usually revolves around the backyard. We had a small house, but a nice, large, unkempt yard. It had trees to climb and a small playset that wound its way around an apple tree. There was the trampoline and a little willow-type shrub with long branches that draped over a hiding place we called “the hobbit hole.” The kids could disappear, play, and picnic in this little hide-a-way. Many daring adventures and battles took place in this yard.
Our new yard is much more tame. It has berries and fruit, a fire pit, fish, bees, and quail, but there is less space to hide and perhaps less opportunity to truly play. The younger kids recently discovered a new substitute “hobbit hole,” but maybe it isn’t inspiring their inner hobbits as much just yet.
Our kids have always been more imaginary players than toy players. There have been trains and lots of Lego, but never an appreciation for figurines or collectable spinning things. They grab a sword, and maybe a bow and arrow, and they are set. The imaginary world of characters they have read about, or have had read to them, come to life and take them on adventures for a short time.
Of course, I see how the powers of media invade and distract from the beauty of this kind of play. A child’s mind is created by God to be formed in a love of truth, goodness, and beauty. The stories they read or hear are meant to inspire them to adventure, selfless goodness, and heroism. Those attributes must lead them to know, love and serve God.
So I resent the distraction I observe, growing like a weed in our home, when the kids ask to watch a YouTube video, perhaps of something even virtuous, or at least authentically funny, instead of asking to hear Daddy read just one more chapter. Swords are easily dropped in exchange for a remote control.
I honestly feel it is a disservice and tragedy. But when Mom or Dad put aside their own laziness to read, I also see how easily the brain and spirit’s natural craving for good things takes over the worldly monotony of memes and trick shot videos. This is why I really believe a parent is called to be a story-teller and play-inspirer.
I certainly do not mean that a parent must be involved in the play, but it is a parent’s calling to watch and discover their child at play.
The power of story is something I have written about and I always strongly encourage parents to read Michael O’Brien’s Landscape With Dragons: The Battle for Your Child’s Mind. That book opened my mind to the beauty of true, good children’s literature, and to the destructive potential of false and ignoble stories. The book includes a large list of stories for all ages that are worthy reads. A quick internet search will also bring up lists of great stories for Catholics (not necessarily “Catholic” stories, but good stories).
I suspect that many people are sick of hearing about The Lord of the Rings or the Narnia series as being important stories for children, but there is no denying the inspiration those books have been in our household, to boys and girl alike. There has been enough adventure drawn from those two series to fill a lifetime, and I cannot interfere when Scott agrees to read them aloud just one more time.
When children hear a story and are driven to put on their breastplates of righteousness and drive into a battle against evil, the story has fulfilled its purpose. Those children are being formed into heroes and saints.
How a child plays is a telling sign of what is important to that child, what moves them to bravery, romance, and sanctity. I hope that the remaining weeks of summer, and even the start of the school year, will be a time of adventure and play for all our children.
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