One day, my roommate removed a bandage that had been covering her toe. She said seeing the infection underneath helped her understand why she was in so much pain. Even though the pain remained intense, it didn’t bother her as much because she found out what was behind it.
It was amazing to see her attitude and demeanour change as soon as she found meaning.
I recall attending a young professionals retreat. The director, Father Andrew L’Heureux, spoke about how offering one’s everyday suffering to God is one of the most powerful expressions of love, and it is this suffering offered with love that is most redemptive and transforming for those we offer it for.
In short, if you want to evangelize someone or love someone, offer your sufferings for them.
It was striking to hear many of the young retreatants share that what they found most inspiring about the retreat was the idea that suffering can become meaningful and even precious.
After hearing this exhortation to offer up one’s suffering, I started putting it into practice and noticed a big shift in attitude in my day-to-day life and experience of pain.
Something happened recently that caused emotional pain and a sense of disconnection from others. I remembered what Father L’Heureux had said and offered my pain with love for those who were inflicting the pain.
The pain didn’t go away, but I had a sense of joy and even peace in the midst of it. I was able to bear it without overreacting or falling into hopelessness.
This was a grace that will come in handy for the rest of my life. What could be more beneficial than to learn how to not only find meaning in pain, but even joy?
I was also given the gift of seeing some of the fruits of my offering: some changes of heart and spiritual renewal. We may not always see the effects of our sacrifices and suffering offered to God in this life, but it was encouraging for me, and I hope others will be encouraged as well.
There have been times since then when I’ve offered up a struggle or pain with love for a special intention. The suffering has turned into joy and I literally didn’t feel the pain or struggle anymore.
This reality of the value of suffering especially speaks to me at this time in our Canadian history when euthanasia is not only more available but even encouraged and celebrated.
It strikes me how in our present culture, we want to avoid pain and discomfort as much as possible, even to the extent of wanting to end life to get rid of physical and emotional pain, not only for the individuals being killed but also for those who care for them.
Father L’Heureux said he believes that Christ on the cross experienced a certain spiritual joy in the midst of the pain, the joy of offering himself fully for the beloved. Even in the midst of suffering his heart was turned in love toward the Father and each one of us.
If we as Christians learn and live this attitude of embracing and offering daily sufferings with love and meaning, it will remain with us at the end of our lives when we may be tempted to give up or give in. It will also help us journey with those who are suffering: offering hope, love and our own presence as Simon of Cyrenes.
If we carry the cross and pain of others, we are affirming their dignity and showing them that pain isn’t the greatest enemy, and that because of Christ’s cross, suffering can even bring joy when offered with love.
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