In September, when I was filled with the renewed energy of a fresh school year, I signed up for a conference to take place in October. This conference – the first of its kind in our archdiocese – was entitled Upper Room. Just as the Holy Spirit descended upon the apostles at Pentecost, blessing them with the gift of evangelization, the conference was designed to inspire participants and equip us with the tools to proclaim our faith in our parishes and communities.
The conference sounded great … in September. By the time the third week of October rolled around, however, I was feeling a bit overwhelmed about many things. Tears filled my eyes as I told a friend about the piles of work accumulating on my desk while I was about to give up an entire Saturday. I felt as though my well had run dry and I had nothing more to give.
On the day of the conference, I was delighted to discover that each speaker captivated my attention. I heard five speakers that day and did not check my watch during any of their sessions. I saw many familiar faces in the crowd and heard words to fuel my weary mind. Most importantly, as I listened, as I prayed, as I sang, the Holy Spirit quenched my thirsty soul.
Sister Miriam James Heidland, from the Society of Our Lady of the Most Holy Trinity, aroused a collective nod of understanding from conference participants as she stated that we “can’t go to the upper room without going to the inner room.” She went on to say we go to “the upper room to proclaim Christ,” but we need to go to the “inner room to claim Christ.”
Sister Miriam James illustrated her point by revisiting the story of the woman at the well. She asked us to recall that Christ deliberately waited for this woman at the well, in the heat of the day when no one else would be around (and when she was physically thirsty), so that, in her spiritual thirst, she could claim him.
He knew she had imperfections and he knew, too, that he loved her and wanted her to know him. He meets us, even in our poverty, because we belong to him, and “the Holy Spirit burns away the falsehoods within us,” Sister stated. How I needed to hear those words!
Sister reminded us, “Every part of our story is claimed by Christ.” Every part. He knows and understands even the parts of my story where feelings of inadequacy exist, when I feel as though I’m falling behind at work or losing my patience with others. He knows my sins and failings and wants me to bring them to him. I am not expected to do anything alone.
Sister Miriam James inspired me to look for Christ when I feel as though my cup is empty. The Saviour comes in thirst of you and me, she reminded us, and he “sits at our well each day.”
On Oct. 26, the Upper Room Conference was my well. I left with a new sense of energy and a profound sense of peace, which more than made up for the catch-up left undone on the weekend. Christ had met me at my well and had filled not only my cup, but my bucket, allowing me to bring him to each task before me.
Sister also stated that Christ “tabernacles among us.” I love this phrase. We receive him in the Eucharist and, yes, we find him in church tabernacles; yet, he continually presents himself to us in the highs and lows of daily life.
I entered the Upper Room Conference feeling overwhelmed. I now realize that, every so often, I need to experience a soul-running-dry feeling to prompt me to quench that thirst through Christ.
I need to renew my ability to claim him in my inner room, so that I may proclaim his love and help fill the buckets of others. In the words of Sister Miriam James, “How can I proclaim him, if I don’t know him?”
