The “glue” in life is formed by the little things which make our world, such as this dandelion bouquet presented with love and joy to Julie VanSpall by a young child. (Julie VanSpall photo)
Life tends to be lived for times of significance. In planning for big moments, many almost prevent themselves from relaxing and going with the flow. Instead of living in the now, a focus on future plans and goals takes over. I’m sure we’ve all had moments when we have been overcome with a long-distance focus, such as graduation, renovations, the championship game, the final concert, the wedding, Christmas, summer.
Additionally, many people find themselves dividing their life stories into chapter-like sections defined by “before” or “after” significant and life-altering events, such as a birth, a death, a triumph, or a tragedy. Time passes, things change, yet “big” moments form the building blocks for the plots of our stories.
In these foundation pieces of life, we develop perseverance, we overcome trials, and we celebrate our successes. We also encounter our God and bond with those he has lovingly placed in our midst.
When we share a common interest, face a loss or an illness together, or work together towards a common goal, it is definitely the significant events which unite us; however, how many momentous happenings really take place in most lifetimes? They certainly don’t occur every day or month; there may even be years between the milestones. So, what happens in between?
I love the following quote by Father Alfred D’Souza: “For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin - real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first ... At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life.”
These words spoke volumes to me when I first read them. I continue to strive to ponder them on a regular basis. Yes, our “big” moments form the foundations of our person, our faith, and our relationships, but how do we actually hold these foundations together? How is it that we manage to persevere? How do we develop relationships?
Well, I like to think of the moments in between life’s building blocks as our “glue.” We need the frustrations, the mundane chores, and the feelings of exhaustion to build our endurance and patience.
We need the listening ears and the hugs of loved ones to encourage us when our hearts are broken or our fears reach their heights.
We need expressions of love and random acts of kindness, helpfulness, and generosity to know God and to bring his presence into the world ourselves. Basically, when our sole focus in life is on future goals, we often deprive ourselves of the joy waiting to be discovered in the process. Each seemingly insignificant event or interaction is real life.
Our “glue” consists of events as well as people. We have family and friends who are with us for the special days: the weddings and the funerals; the yearly celebrations and noteworthy happenings. These people are extremely important in our lives, deserving of our love, respect and praise; yet, what about the family and friends who are with us every other day?
By “every other,” I do not mean “alternate” days; I mean every other day in life. Who are those who are always there for us, who care to listen when we are angry or upset? Who are those who love to hear about the funny things that have happened to us, and who pray for us and text just to say hello? Who wants to know how your doctor’s appointment went? Who are the people we greet in the hallways at work, or sit with in the stands at our kids’ sports? These people and the moments they share with us are our glue.
It’s important to set goals in life and to remember the events that have helped to form us. It is even more important to “feel this life” as Terry Hershey states. “Before we succumb to ‘someday,’ let us inhale this day ... let us taste this life. We make the choice to be open. To be available. To be curious. To be alive. To be willing to be surprised by joy.” (Terry Hershey, Sabbath Moment, April 16, 2018)
God is in every moment – big and small - of every single day. As we plan for and anticipate the “building blocks” in life, let us never forget to embrace and acknowledge the “glue” which meaningfully and unassumingly holds each life story together.